pineapples do not grow on pine trees

People are like pineapples.

Not what you expected to be compared to? Tonight, my grandfather handed me a fresh pineapple he bought for us at the grocery. As I held it, I began thinking about the outer layer of a pineapple. It's hard and protective, but not something that can't be cut open with the right device. And once you get to the insides, you get to the more useful part--some of which are incredibly bitter, and some that are a sweet surprise.

People also tend to have a hard and protective outer shell. There is something about human nature, perhaps our vulnerability, pride, and fear, that causes us to try to keep ourselves from the harm that could ensue from being completely open. If a person knows your thoughts, your dreams, your questions, the things you don't understand, your secret flaws and weaknesses, etc., they have some degree of power over you...or so we believe. But what we also fail to acknowledge is the good that can come from being to some degree transparent and letting people get to truly know us.

Sure, people remember that (those) thing(s) you did in high school or college that you regret and which some person knows about. And some people will use your past and your flaws as blackmail to keep you from ratting them out...and the circle continues. But perhaps we look at people mostly wrong.

Stereotypes are natural. Unfortunately most stereotypes end in negative results of categorizing and not truly getting to know people, but they can also be used to protect, etc...or at least we tell ourselves. Stereotyping is actually a natural function of the human brain to make shortcuts. That is correct, you have lazy brain syndrome. But just like anything else our brain processes, it tries to find patterns and shortcuts to be able to process more information at a more rapid pace. Not too shabby. But the downside is that when one person, perhaps even one group of people, has hurt us, we stereotype that all (or least most humans) must be out to get us.

Yes, I will agree that human nature tends to be extremely selfish and that we all hurt each other (whether intentionally or not), but some of us build up our wall of protection so high that we become bitter, cynical, and we prevent others from knowing our greatest attributes. So there's got to be a balance.

Take a second to think of something about yourself most others do not know about. Maybe it's a talent, skill, hobby, weakness, etc. Could others benefit from knowing about this? Sometimes things are of greater value if they are kept private, and I'm not arguing that you should tell everyone everything in your life. So is not the case. The point I'm trying to get across (and maybe not as effectively as I wish) is that fear can startle growth in relationships, friendships, and in yourself.

Perhaps by losing the pride and opening up about what scares you, someone will relate to a situation or thought you have experienced and have wounds healed as a result. Who knows what the situation could be...maybe you've been raped and you'll tell someone who's kept the same secret all this time. Maybe your parents never held you enough as a child. Maybe you fell in love and were deceived...and the list goes on. I completely believe that we all face challenges for a reason (and often multiple reasons). For one, we can be encouraged that James 1:2-3 tells us that the trials of our faith works patience (in other words, we become more complete people from what we face). And secondly, like I said--our struggles help us to help others.

So how do we get to the point where we can open up? In all honesty, most of us may not understand why we are so reserved or even that we are. When we don't ponder our motives, subconscious or not, we may overlook both our strengths and weaknesses. So try to figure out who or what incident has maybe made you more closed off, distrusting, etc. to people (strangers, family, and friends alike). Then consider this: 1 John 4:18, "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." So if we are commanded to love one another as ourselves, then should that not be a love without fear?
Perfect love casts out fear. Wow. Isn't that the type of love we're striving for? After all, we are commanded to be like Christ, and He had perfect love.

So, are you a pineapple? Do you have a hard core that needs cracking into? Is what's on your inside sweet or bitter? What can you do to become a better you?

Each small step is progress. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. A tunnel begins one shovel at a time, but a new path is opened with much perseverance.

Persevere and reap the vast rewards of determination.