if a cliche could solve the world's problems, i'd be serious as a heart attack about finding it

Days like today. Oh jolly.

Happy Thanksgiving while we're on the topic.

So it's days like today. Days like today when I'm laughing so hard with my family that I literally am about to pee myself. Days like today where I get over 20 hugs and loving embraces. Days like today where I eat sooo much that I'm full beyond full. Days like today when I'm warmed by the thoughts and concerns of others that just want to know about me--my life--because they care.

...oh these days, they make me smile. They make me laugh. They make me cry. At first, I cry because I have tears of joy. I think, God, what have I done to deserve so much? That's just it, I haven't. Then, this cry turns into tears of pain and concern...as my heart breaks. I begin to think about all the little babies in this world that just don't get held enough. I think about that guy I go to college with whose dad abandoned him, whose mom is too concerned with her job and her girlfriend to make him a priority, the guy who because he aches so much for love is afraid to let anyone in. I think about the mother who wonders, on this day of great feasting for so many, where she will find the next meal for her child--not even concerned about herself. I think about the man who has hit some rough patches in his life, turned to alcohol, and can't actually remember the last time he laughed. I think about one of the people I love dearest--how he lost his father at a young age, and I wonder if he longs every Thanksgiving to be in daddy's arms again--to make up for all those Thanksgivings as a child that Daddy was never there.

And then I pray. I pray that God would give me wisdom and understanding. I pray that He would help me to know how to best change lives. I struggle with this. Some days I want so badly to just fix the world--to hold every baby there is and give them love, to give that woman enough money to feed a tribe, to be the friend that helps that man break his alcoholism, to be the breakthrough of love and understanding in that friend's life...and so on and so forth. But I cannot fix everything. I can't. It's not within my power, no matter how much I may want it. So I pray for this wisdom that God will show me what I can do to be most effective, not only in directly helping others, but also in inspiring others that they can do the same. I long to be the drop in the bucket that creates ripples that become tidal waves. Or heck, I'll even settle for being a ripple that causes another ripple. I just want to see God's great love spread and people to be fulfilled.

Sometimes when people see these horrible situations, they want to blame God. 'why do these horrible things happen, if He is in control?' we wonder. I've heard many valid explanations, and I don't pretend to know God's thoughts and ways (they are higher than mine, Isaiah 55)...but what works best for me at least is acknowledging that at the beginning of time, evil entered the world. Because of 'simple' sins like selfishness, anger, pride, greed, etc., we have the resulting consequences. ...so I'm not looking for perfection. But rather than attribute all that's wrong to sin and these things and just move on, admitting that that's how the world has been for so long, I pray that I put aside selfishness, pride, desires for wealth, attention, and comfort in the name of Christ's cause and to help this hurting world. I don't say this to look good. I don't even say this because it means I'll hold up to it.I sure hope I will, but I am not going to pretend like I don't have glaring faults. I'm on a journey and working toward the best me. But I say these things to keep myself accountable (I hope you'll help) and to speak the desires of my heart. I hope they will be contageous and impact others to do the same. I pray that these desires of my heart become greater than any other desires in my heart. And I pray this that people around the world less fortunate than I can take the wishes of 'Have a Happy Thanksgiving' and see them come true for perhaps the first time in their lives.

I pray for those hurting in this world. I hope you'll do the same.

And as Tiny Tim would say, 'God bless us, every one.' Happy Thanksgiving and goodnight.

don't let Mr. Scrooge get between you and the alarm clock

AHHH Mondays. They just seem to take the life out of ya don't they? Well, for a good number of people they do. But why? Isn't the end of the weekend merely a mindset? Doesn't this happen every week, 52 times a year? (the answer here is yes). But I admit, sometimes Mondays seem tougher and more stressed filled.

Welcome to Monday morning, the ceasing of my dreaming. Generally when I wake up on Monday mornings, it's like I download my to-do list in my mind for all I have to accomplish today and this week. Oh joy...But instead, this morning when I woke up and the mental download and related tension and stress started, it ceased. Then God showed me this:

Time
Value
Mission

When you go to worry or stress, or judge yourself as a failure/success (related to yesterday's blog), stop and consider these 3 tests.
1)Time-The time you have the ability to most directly influence is that of today and that within your direct reach. Thus, if you cannot influence something in the future with your actions today, there is no sense worrying or stressing about it, for it is not a trouble of today (Matthew 6:34). (For example, don't worry about if everyone will make it to Christmas play practice next Wednesday--you cannot influence that with actions...give it to God). And even if you can influence something in the time you have set before you, that does not mean you should stress, but seek wisdom in using that concern to most efficiently and effectively conquer the challenge or task.
2) Value- The resources, talents, and money you have set in front of you are the value you need to be concerned with. That is to say, be content with these resources (whether you're making minimum wage or you just flat out can't sing) and use them to the best of your ability for God's glory. There is no need to fret about a talent God has not blessed you with or funds He did not provide for you to conquer your tasks today. Remember James 1:2-3 tells us that struggles/trials (even with speaking in public or making ends meet) produce endurance and ultimately develop us as people.
3) Mission- Here's the biggie. Remind yourself when you wake each morning what your mission is. And what is your mission?--you, ask yourself? Hopefully as a Christian, you identify your mission to be sharing the love of Christ and His message of salvation. When you go to judge 'successes' and 'failures' in your life, before you get all down and out, compare them to this mission, and reevaluate--was it really a failure? was it really a success? This helps me when I face challenges or big tasks at work or home. If I remind myself that no matter what my test score comes out to be or my project at work results in that it's most important to live and share His Gospel, it seems to take pressure off of the stresses of life and help me navigate with wisdom in more difficult situations.

So next time you go to fret, or your Monday morning wake up isn't fresh and exciting, remember Time, Value, Mission....are you using your time and the resources/valuables provided to you to accomplish His mission? What can you do today to ensure that you are?

'ripe for the picking' doesn't mean you get to pick

Promises, promises. We make them to each other a lot without realizing it. On the night before an exam we confirm our friends by saying, 'I'm sure you'll do great,' but that doesn't change the amount of Chemistry they know going into and exam...and that friend still very realistically could fail. Or perhaps it's the post-breakup speech of 'you'll find someone...there's someone better out there for you.' ...but perhaps not, and they end up living single for the rest of their lives. So is this wrong? Is this a lie? You wrestle with that yourself, it's not my point today. Moving the idea forward....
So the intent behind these promises, this reassurance we so freely hand out is good I think. And often, the results are exactly as we predict them. But what about those random cases where that person fails their exam or someone ends up single their entire life?

The real situation is not at all that they're single or they failed, or whatever their 'boo boo' dilemma may be, it's the fact that society has labeled these situations BAD....when in fact, they are not bad at all. What if tragedy is part of God's plan?

Here are some testaments to that:
1. Good friend of mine struggles in nursing school...switches programs, switches schools (negative, negative)...but finds her passion. Bad? not at all.
2. My aunt did not get married until well into her 40s. Because of her singleness, she often took my brother and I out on weekends. Some of my fondest childhood memories and most influential moments were formed because her weekends were free. Bad? still a nope.
3. Two people at my church cannot have children of their own. So they reach out to orphans and provide a home for a child who needs the love of parents as much as they desire the love of a child. Bad?....I'm still seeing way too many positives.
4. The beautiful and amazing Penny dies from cancer at an early age (and goes out strong). Because of this, the family pulls a little closer together, a sister rededicates her life to Christ and pulls out of years of depression. Bad? Well I sure miss her, but God brought good from the bad AGAIN.

So, here's the point. Yeah, being single for you right now may be horrible...and I don't know, maybe you'll never get married. Then again, maybe next week you'll meet the most amazing man/woman in the world who is 'totally out of your league' and fall madly in love. I cannot predict the future. And yeah, failing out of pre-med is no sweet drink to swallow, but maybe the result of that is you going to the air force and changing someones life. Or maybe there's a reason you lost your job last week. Perhaps God has a 6 figure salary waiting for you somewhere. Or maybe you'll struggle for a bit but ultimately come out more content and be able to help someone you couldn't have helped had you been at work 40 hours a week. In whatever gloom and doom situation you may be in, remember there's one who can predict the future, who knows the future, who controls the future, and who has this super awesome plan that we can't fully comprehend.

So shoot for the stars, the moon, a 14 point buck, your deepest desires, whatever, but also realize that in your weakest moments and biggest failures that He's still got a plan and that He's got a reason. I don't agree with the prosperity movement that says 'follow God and all will be well and you'll be rich'....wrong. Instead, follow God and look for wealth beyond your paycheck, for value beyond the dollar sign, and for joy in the unexpected. There is a good side to everything--which do you choose to see? ...Dig deep.

I'll close with this--the scripture that inspired this whole diddly. Isaiah 55:8-12 talks about how God's thoughts are higher than ours, as are His ways higher than ours. His word does not go out void, but what He means to be accomplished will be accomplished. And also, He will give us peace if we allow Him in. Psalm 85 was the other scripture inspiration (and I recommend you go read both of these for yourself). Specifically, Psalm 85:12, "The Lord will indeed give what is good, and our land will yield its harvest." Focus on the harvest--and remember it will come in, but it may be different than you expect. Don't let the corn spoil because you expected wheat. He still provides.

I pray God blesses you and keeps you, and that you see His goodness in all the 'badness' of this world.

God's awesomeness: it's simple math.

Multiplication tables. We learn them at a young age. Basically, you take one number with another number and together they far surpass what each other would have amounted to alone. With Christ, just as with multiplication factors, we can far surpass any of our abilites. Just look at John 6:1-14. You've probably heard the story of the boy with 5 loaves and 2 fish, but give it another gander and perhaps you'll learn something new. Just before Christ fed the thousands, Philip exclaimed it would take a half year's wages to feed the crowd. And yet, somehow--God's how--one boy's 5 loaves and 2 fish became a half year's wages. I've been struggling recently to see how my limited abilities can glorify God and serve His will, His people, and His purpose in the huge needs of this world. Although I can certainly not fix all the problems in the world, I see Him over and over again take my limited abilities and multiply them many times over...God is a master of exponents (and everything else as well.)

So give it your best shot, and then--as momma always says--'let go, and let God.'

isn't that lovely

How do you know when 2 people are in love? Is it the butterflies? No, wait...unless you're one of the 2 parties you certainly can't feel the butterflies. So then is it all the physical affection? No, not so much that either...after all, plenty of people not in love show lots of affection. So then, what is true love?

Perhaps you'd like to insert a clause in here and say something like, 'it depends..on who you ask.' Many would argue that the definition of love varies throughout time and culture and age. Ok, I'll give you that. But there is one trait with love that has existed throughout all time.

True love is most evident by commitment. Think about it--a Dad that truly loves his children will do what he thinks necessary to make them best off (whether his translation of that is providing for them or playing with them), that couple in college that truly love each other find a way around all the homework to see each other, and so on and so forth. True love, true desire for something is proven by priority. Anything deemed worthwhile will be given time.

So let's talk your love relationship with God....if you have one. If people were to see your actions, your commitments, your priorities would they point to true love?

Now I'm not saying live so that people will be like 'oooohhh ahhhh Christian,' but rather that--just like 2 young lovebirds--people just know.

So hit up Ephesians 5:1-17. It speaks about being fit to serve--the very essence of love with Christ: being committed to loving His desires, His will, and His requests also. When 2 people love each other, they go above and beyond to make the other look good to others (talk em up), feel good (reconfess and reconfess that love), and accomplish their goals/dreams (for God, it's His will).

Are you needing 'couple's' therapy?

welcome to the streets of NYC, 1994

The following is something a chapter from a book I found at a used bookstore, Am I Going to Heaven?: The Shocking Story of America's Street Kids. It was written by a nun from Covenant House, a place that took kids off the street. Read it from the perspective of 1994, when it was written.

"On the street I saw a girl cold and shivering in a thin dress, with little hope of a decent meal. I became angry and said to God, 'Why did you permit this? Why don't you do something about it?' For a while God said nothing. That night He replied quite suddenly: 'I certainly did something about it. I made you.'"

....
Chapter 13, May 1994
"She sauntered over to the van, hips swaying in her short white shorts, acting cooler than cool.
But her eyes betrayed her. There was nothing happy inside them.
'Can't get too excited about nothin' when you're out on the street, man,' she said.
'It's really good to see you, Bernetta,' we said.
We all felt like just throwing our arms around her that first night, but we couldn't. Bernetta was like a skittish colt, and the last thing we wanted to do was scare her off. We were determined to take things slow.
So was she. At first, all she would accept was a cup of lemonade. Then she'd head back to 25th and 9th, the corner of New York City her pimp owned...all pimps have their 'territory'...and hustle for the rest of the night.
But after a few visits, Bernetta began to stay a little longer. Sometimes, she'd accept a cheese sandwich. And slowly, she began to reveal a little more of herself.
In fact, getting to know Bernetta was like peeling layers off an onion. Including the tears.
'I was already 'broken in' before I got to the city,' she said one night, shrugging her shoulders. 'My step-dad, he raped me the first time when I was nine.
'Then, whenever he had a little to drink, he'd come creeping into my bedroom, late at night.
'One night, I tried putting a chair up against the door to keep him out. It worked pretty good. But the next day, he was so mad, he smashed that chair to bits, and gave me a black eye.
'He told me if I ever said a word, he's hurt me bad. Course, he already had....'
Her voice trailed off and she looked inside our van, blinking furiously to drive back the teardrops that hung precariously in the corner of each eye.
She shook her head and swallowed hard.
'After a few years, I left. But I couldn't do nothin', I never finished school. I couldn't get a job.
'Then I met Freddie (her pimp). He told me there was only one thing in the world I knew how to do, and if I wanted to stay alive on the streets, I better do what I know best.
'I guess he was right,' she said, smiling ruefully.
'He's not right, and don't you believe it,' we said furiously. We could tell Bernetta was startled. That's why we usually try not to let kids see our anger.
But sometimes we can't help it.
These young girls come from across America to New York City, looking to escape from men...fathers, brothers, friends, men they loved and trusted...who have stolen their innocence and shattered their dreams.
By the time they get onto the streets, their self-esteem could fit onto the head of a pin.
Then their pimp tells them that they're good for nothing, that they deserve nothing--and that tiny speck of self worth disappears. Or turns into self loathing. Or gets buried in some deep, secret place.
'Bernetta, we want you to come back to Covenant House with us.' Her eyes clouded over with fear.
'I can't. Freddie would kill me. He doesn't even know I talk to you guys. I can't, I just can't.'
She began to sob.
'You know where Covenant House is?' we asked. She nodded. 'You have one of our cards?' She nodded again.
We touched her hand. 'We're going to say an extra prayer for you.' (We didn't know then just how much she would need that prayer.)
She smiled through her tears and headed back to her corner of hell.
A few nights ago, the van swung by the corner of 25th and 9th, as we always do. We were really hoping to see Bernetta.
But when we got to the corner and started to pull up to the curb, Bernetta frantically waved us back.
Then she turned on her heel and started walking in the opposite direction.
We pulled away and headed down the street. But we were uncomfortable. And not a little scared. Something was very, very wrong.
So we turned the corner and headed back up the block. When we got there, I saw why Bernetta had tried to warn us off.
Her pimp held her against the wall with one arm. With the other, he punched and slapped her across the face and screamed obscenities.
'Who do you think you're talking to in that van, girl? You want to talk, you talk to me!'
When he spotted the van, he grabbed Bernetta by the hair and dragged her out of sight.
We drove after Bernetta and her pimp, but they escaped down a narrow alleyway.
A few hours later we came back to find her. She was back on the corner. But when we tried to come near, she shook her head and waved us away.
That was a few nights ago.
I think about Bernetta all the time. I think about her sad, empty eyes, and hope that there's still a twinkle hidden deep inside. Mostly, I hope she hung on to that card.
And I pray that God will show her the way to our door.
What I would like to ask this month is that you add your prayers to mine. Pray that Bernetta looks deep into her heart and finds that little speck of self-esteem that I know is buried there.
Pray that she has the strength to take the biggest step of her life...away from her pimp, away from the street, and onto the steps of the only place in New York City where she can be safe--Covenant House.
I described Bernetta to all our staff members, and asked them to let me know when she arrives, whether it's 6 o'clock in the morning or midnight.
Because I want to be there at the door to greet her, and tell her how glad I am she came.
My friend, I hope she does make it to our door. With your prayers, and a little help from Him, I think she will."

Once again, the previous was an excerpt from Sr. Mary Rose McGeady's Am I Going to Heaven?: The Shocking Story of America's Street Kids-- an eye-opening look at lifestyles that surround you, but that you may not often consider.

So, how bad was your day, again?

Keep life in perspective. Keep others in your prayers.

Perhaps you have a role to play in helping someone out that's in an ugly situation?